Not sure what your career path is, but I'm going to make the assumption that you're a software developer. SF and NYC are silly expensive (I live in Silicon Valley, south of the city, and it's also very expensive). You don't list these places, but I'd take a look at Boulder and Denver. Both have thriving startup communities, and both are reasonable in terms of price of living. If you like big city, go Denver, looking for a more tight-knit community, check out Boulder.