also, there are a number of disciplines and interdisciplines devoted to identity studies (identity politics, african american studies, women studies, queer studies, whiteness, etc.). whether you come from a background to have read them or whether or not you have been conditioned to respect them, they have spent a lot of time thinking about these issues (30-40ish years as a recognized part of academy) and have a lot of smart things to say if this question truly interests you.