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The best way to look at it is that "are you aware" is always condescending. There are two answers; yes and no. If they say yes, they have to apologize for not adding your feature. If they say no, you're calling them ignorant. There isn't an out that deescalates and reduces the toxicity, so you're forcing everyone to now be as rude as you.

Phrasing your statement like "my corporate year starts on November 15th; is there any way to offset the start of the year?" would sound nicer. If the author was aware of that and didn't add the feature, then they can say so. Or if they weren't aware, they can say "good idea". Now nobody has to get defensive and the heat of the conversation can generally decrease, keeping everyone happy and polite.



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