In January 2022, my mother died in the hospital. At the time, she had severe dementia and COPD. I moved back to take care of her, but I also lost my job. The stress was insurmountable: caregiving, sleep deprivation, and poor financial condition. It's like I used up all my energy at that time, just to fight the inevitable.

It's been three years and now I can manage my life on a certain level. But all those unsightly, dark struggles still haunt me. I never overcome them. Deep down I know, I'm a runaway, forever.