This is of course very context dependent and no critique whatsoever. I also have kids and my self-hosting became ever more important since. No Youtube commercials or auto-continuation for kid-videos thanks to invidious, reduced costs due to a lot of cancelled software plans (because everything runs on my rust), I can care better for my parents, e.g. helping with technology, monitoring, burglars (my homelab sits at my parents house, remotely connected via IPSEC), data backup is solid and under my control (ZFS Rz2, & offsite backup with borgmatic & rsync), and most important I have reduced my life dependencies and lock-in effects to worldwide companies.
Maintenance is 1-2 hours a month: Proxmox, various Docker nested in unprivileged LXC, everything automated (cronjobs, Watchtower, Backups etc.). I also built a pretty big PV-plant to safe energy costs (30wkp). My main strategy was a "minimal" approach, going slowly, thinking carefully _what I really need_ and preferring robustness over new features or software. I usually take 1-2 months of review before deciding to install any new software, most often longer. I am against the "All in One" mentality (e.g. prefer custom bash scripts over third-party automation; or selectively install needed parts instead of the all-in-one alternatives, e.g. nextcloud/all-in-one).
Maintenance is 1-2 hours a month: Proxmox, various Docker nested in unprivileged LXC, everything automated (cronjobs, Watchtower, Backups etc.). I also built a pretty big PV-plant to safe energy costs (30wkp). My main strategy was a "minimal" approach, going slowly, thinking carefully _what I really need_ and preferring robustness over new features or software. I usually take 1-2 months of review before deciding to install any new software, most often longer. I am against the "All in One" mentality (e.g. prefer custom bash scripts over third-party automation; or selectively install needed parts instead of the all-in-one alternatives, e.g. nextcloud/all-in-one).