As a habitual interrupter, this is one of my big fears when talking to non-interrupters. For me, frequent brief interruptions is how I follow along with what the other person is saying—otherwise it's almost certain I'll lose track. If I am not actively engaged in a conversation, I find it very difficult to retain anything from that conversation, so in a way, coming from me interruption is intended as a sign of respect, because it means I care about what you're saying and want to constantly check my understanding. I am always terrified that people will see it as rude or dismissive, because that's not at all how I intend it—it's just how I process new information.
Luckily, most people I interact with seem to not be put off by it, and I make an effort to make it obvious that my interjections are supposed to come across as encouraging. In situations where it's best for me to remain silent, I often struggle to keep from losing interest. My retention rate for Zoom calls is close to zero as a result!
I quit my last job for several reasons but one was my team leader's inability to go 10 seconds without interrupting myself or someone else. I'd caution anyone against romanticizing it because for some people, being unable to complete a thought without interruption is unbearable.
To expand on why this can be so frustrating for me at least:
* If I have something significant or impactful to say, and someone interrupts midway through, the effect is diminished.
* If I'm saying something which I intend to follow with a qualification, e.g. "Elegant code is a priority, but we need to actually deliver code too", and someone interrupts before I add my qualification to dispute my claim or add their own qualification, then now we have pointless conflict, and I appear silly as though my statement wasn't thought through.
* If someone interrupts to complete my thought for me, and they get it wrong, suddenly I have to navigate the social implications of gently shutting them down and possibly returning to their comment later, and I'm now focusing on that instead of the topic.
* One can engage in active listening without interjecting at every opportunity, but admittedly it takes practice to learn the cues of each person you're speaking to and when is an appropriate time to jump in. I'm sure that I've been interrupted by many people many times in my life so far, but there's only 2 that I remember as having made a habit of it. Probably because they did it regularly, never caught themselves and apologised, and frustrated me which I imagine imprinted on me in some way as emotional events tend to.
mkaic, I don't mean to liken you to these people. I obviously don't know you or the way you converse so please take these only as anecdotes about the experiences of someone on the other end of the interruption spectrum. I've also just seen another comment of yours relating to "good" and "bad" interrupters and that seems like a reasonable distinction. I think my experience is with the bad ones, and maybe the good ones just fly under the radar because it feels like a natural interaction.
I prefer wait style, but I don't mind occasional interruptions so long as they are very brief and immediately yield control back to the original talker. Like:
---
A: We just got a new shipment of XYZs, we need to --
B: Woa woa sorry, what's a XYZ again?
A: It's a type of ABC.
B: Right, okay.
A: Anyway, we need to ...
---
In that exchange, it's still implicitly A's turn even when B is speaking; B is just "borrowing" the turn and has to give it back quickly. I wouldn't find this rude; B just did it so he wouldn't be bamboozled by the unfamiliar term in the rest of the conversation. But if B had interrupted and started off down on his own topic, like how in his opinion it's a bad idea to buy XYZs and we should make our own instead, that would be rude. That's stealing A's turn, not borrowing.
Matching communication styles with your coworkers is very important. I was once in a team with mostly non-interrupters and was unhappy (but didn't really realise it). I moved cities, countries (to a more interrupty place), and teams, and my new coworkers and manager interrupt all the time. I think the flow of conversation is much better, and we get on the same page faster.
Obviously people can change communication styles over time (see the article for an example), but sometimes people prefer things a certain way. And that's fine!
If someone's obviously not an interrupter, I try to consciously pause for questions and avoid interrupting. Learning about different communication styles and trying not to dominate is crucial too.
Luckily, most people I interact with seem to not be put off by it, and I make an effort to make it obvious that my interjections are supposed to come across as encouraging. In situations where it's best for me to remain silent, I often struggle to keep from losing interest. My retention rate for Zoom calls is close to zero as a result!