I suppose the expectation is that unless you are escaping imminent danger (refugee status) or joining a loved one (marriage), your decision to change your home is a calculated move - and the gov't gives a similarly calculated go-ahead. In other words, you are describing a niche of "I am OK now, and would like to join you", and the government responds with "we are OK now, so what will you bring along?".

Not making a judgment about the ethical conclusions of that, though.