Former heavy drinker here. I used to get very drunk about once a week (exclusively in social situations). I had to cut down on alcohol significantly few years ago, due to a health problem that came about unrelated to drinking. Now I get drunk maybe 2-3 times a year.
I was disappointed that I didn't get any of the benefits I frequently found mentioned online. I didn't lose any weight, my skin didn't look better, my thinking hasn't become any more clear, I didn't become more productive and my relationships haven't improved. But those were all in pretty decent shape while I was still drinking regularly.
All in all, life just became a little more boring. It wasn't even that hard to reduce my drinking, after having come to terms with the life-becoming-more-boring part. I just wish there was some substance which would fill the same niche without the health risks. Weed isn't really it.
I'm 2.5 months sober and this has been my experience as well. I'm now much more wary of getting myself into situations where I might be bored. I'm naturally extraverted so I still enjoy the social aspect of parties but I've cut back on the amount of dates that I go on since the risk of being bored is too high.
I've started meditating to try and raise my "boredom tolerance". It's too early to say if it has made any difference but I've met people who swear by it. I'm also trying to get more curious about other people and essentially rely on my extraversion to deal with boring situations.
In terms of substances to fill the niche I don't think there's anything that exists. Coffee is nice during the day but drinking it past a certain time leads to insomnia. I've mostly just taken to drinking a wide variety of non-alcoholic beverages LaCroix and non-alcoholic beer.
Pharmacologically speaking the closest drugs would be GABA receptor agonists (e.g. phenibut, benzos, GHB) but those can be quite nasty and even more addictive than alcohol. I have not personally tried them and don't plan on it.
Not that I'm encouraging you to try this, but a low dose of nasal ketamine (5-20mg) has you feeling like you've had a few drinks.
The effects last for up to 2 hours, and there is no hangover. In a way that's difficult to describe, the effects also feel "cleaner" somehow than alcohol.
It can be psychologically addictive for some people, but does not cause physical dependency.
If you're adverse to snorting powder (very understandable), ketamine is water soluble, so you can dissolve it in saline solution and put in a metered nasal spray bottle (which typically deliver ~0.13 ml/spray).
For some people weed might not be it, but for me it is. A combination of coffee and a strong sativa edible for an evening outing satisfies my escapist tendencies and is quite enjoyable for me.
When I cut back on my drinking I tried the weed substitute (I live where where its legal, and could experiment with strains) but never found anything that was "fun". Interesting, yes, but not a substitute. I know plenty of folks who vastly prefer it to alcohol, though, which I think is great.
One thing I've found with weed is that it's not really fun on its own, it just changes how you perceive what you're already doing. So rather than sit at a bar with friends I find myself choosing to see live music, or to play music, build something, or do some other creative endeavor.
It's definitely not a one to one replacement for alcohol, as I don't find myself doing exactly the same things as I would if I went out drinking, but what I do when I get high generally feels more fulfilling.
I was disappointed that I didn't get any of the benefits I frequently found mentioned online. I didn't lose any weight, my skin didn't look better, my thinking hasn't become any more clear, I didn't become more productive and my relationships haven't improved. But those were all in pretty decent shape while I was still drinking regularly.
All in all, life just became a little more boring. It wasn't even that hard to reduce my drinking, after having come to terms with the life-becoming-more-boring part. I just wish there was some substance which would fill the same niche without the health risks. Weed isn't really it.