Are we just comparing any old-ish languages we don't like to COBOL now?

Applescript has its problems but it's one of my favorite features in macOS. Maybe not the language itself, but the Apple Events capability. There's no equivalent in Windows other than AutoHotKey type stuff.

For AppleScript, the analogy seemed apt, as both AppleScript and COBOL set out to design a syntax resembling conversational English more than a typical programming language would.

Thank you, I've never actually seen COBOL code (presumably a good thing...)