Yeah really! cperciva had a great tweet on this a few days ago: "Probably the most important thing to keep in mind when reading the FreeBSD Code of Conduct is that we weren't trying to change any rules. Rather, we were trying to elaborate on the rule under which the FreeBSD project has operated for years: Don't Be An Asshole."

Exactly what happened in LLVM as well: let make it explicit what the expectations have always been and how everyone (most) already behave! https://llvm.org/docs/CodeOfConduct.html

It rather looks like an elaboration on the rule: "be free to label your critic as asshole"

Well that's easy to avoid- don't give anyone ammunition with which to dismiss you as an asshole. It's totally unrelated to whether or not someone really is an asshole. It's trivially easy, and if it's not trivially easy, well that's a big giant glowing arrow pointing at an impending personal growth opportunity with a reward:effort ratio that's off the charts.

Whether or not someone is an actual asshole, the ability to avoid misunderstandings is critical to moving forward and getting stuff done and not wasting time on distractions and petty arguments. CoC's are simply an organization's defense mechanism against pointless interpersonal chaos that doesn't belong on their mailing lists (or whatever) in the first place.

Source: genetically inclined to be a total and complete asshole, have spent the last few decades trying to get better though.

Or "anyone not familiar with the fashionable norms du jour, here's a list of potential thought crimes as derived by one country's culture (and its internal conflicts, cultural politics, and religious and post-religious baggage) and imposed on supposedly global communities".

Nothing in the list is a thought crime. Everything in the list is an action.

In what country is it acceptable to not treat others with basic courtesy and respect? Which is really all the list is asking for.

Basic courtesy and respect doesn't need much of a list.

This is a long list of codified norms du jour to launch endless power micro-games and let attention-seeking holler than though people to run the show.

Why not just say that, then?

Because experience has taught us that some people need it explained in a bit more detail what constitutes basic courtesy and respect.

If they don't know it already, I doubt thrusting a CoC document at them will enlighten them. People who are rude are intentionally rude. It's kinda the whole point to being rude.

I agree with you to some extent, but note that we have all sorts of traffic laws and not just a generic "drive safely."

Asking you not to relate your religious opinion of fat people is not the same as oppressing your religion.